Anonymous Trolls Oprah
It may be time for Oprah to buy an alarm system and a dog. Anonymous has just uncovered the most the most fertile trolling ground since LiveJournal's babymama communities: Oprah Winfrey.
Oprah Crusades for CP Law - And Gets Pwned
This week Oprah has been harping on her viewers to call Congress to voice their support for Senate Bill 1738 - The PROTECT Our Children Act.
On her Monday show, she even shared chilling messages posted to her Oprah.com message board. She quoted these postings as "evidence" of how internet predators are organized in their sick, evil pursuits. Have a look:
"If you still don't understand what our children are up against, let me read you something that was posted on our message boards from someone who claims to be a member of a known pedophile network. It said this, he doesn't forgive, he doesn't forget. His people have over 9,000 penises and they're all raping children. So, I want you to know they're organized and they have systematic ways of hurting children."
For those of you who are up on your internet memes, you'll instantly recognize the creed of Anonymous (Steroidus Hacktococi), "We do not forgive, we do not forget" and the ancient meme "it's over 9,000!!!!" These are some serious lulz.
The Lulz Are Over 9,000
Remember, trolls will say whatever it takes to get a reaction out of you. The more dramatic and outrageous the reaction, the lulzier (funnier) it is for us. And Oprah sure did deliver! Right there on her TV show, for millions to see, Oprah Winfrey cited a bogus message board entry as hardcore evidence of how evil predators are. Oprah, did you learn nothing from your James Frey incident? You need to research this stuff before you put it out there! As of this moment, you're as bad as that crazy family member who forwards every bogus e-mail scare that Snopes debunked years ago. If you're not careful, your personal army is going to ignore your ranting.
And now that Oprah has fallen for it once, Anonymous will be coming after her in ways she cannot predict to get as many lulz as they can. Expect them.
Oprah Needs Help
I would totally go on the Oprah show to explain trolling and the wild side of the Internet. If one little troll can humiliate Oprah's crusade this much, then this is something people need to know about.
Dr. Phil wanted to have me on his show to talk about the Craigslist Experiment and to put me face-to-face with some of the guys who "participated" in it. I said, "no, thanks. I don't think an appearance like that on the Dr. Phil show would be very productive." Dr. Phil is all about sensationalizing interpersonal drama for cheap ratings. He doesn't actually help anyone.
But, Oprah! Oprah is a different story! She's classy. She probably wouldn't get it, but it would be fun to try to explain it to her. Call me, k?
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[ trolling published on 2008-09-19 | Comments (1) | Permalink (361) ]
Don't Click The Last Link: Response to the NYT
The NY Times published its article, The Trolls Among Us, which delves into the internet subculture of trolling. Author Mattathias Schwartz talked to me, LiveJournal user Weev, and Encyclopedia Dramatica on why trolls do what they do, how they think, and what it means to the Internet. He even covered the irascible 4chan /b/ which is home to Scientology's biggest threat: Anonymous.
Since the article came out Thursday, it's already generated a fair amount of reaction. But on Friday, Mattathias, Weev, and I all had updates and responses to the piece, that changes the game somewhat. More after the cut.
Excerpt:
"I typically am cautious of the press. Every time the press and I cross paths, it simply causes trouble for me or those around me. I while ago I met with Matt Schwartz from the New York Times Magazine, under the explicit condition that I would be covering philosophy and history and not my personal business. I feel I didn't really get what I want out of this exchange, as the important philosophy I conveyed to him was only conveyed in short bits that I think were taken out of context."
Excerpt:
"Trolls have a parasitic relationship with their targets - that is to say, a relationship of dependence. As much as trolls like to abuse their targets, they need them to stick around and stay angry. A homogeneous community of trolls is like the 4chan random bulletin board, /b/, meaningless noise. So in a sense, a bit of trolling can be taken as a sign of a healthy community, because it needs a backdrop of sincere users and shared norms to feed on."
As you can see, the views are diverging dramatically already. But that's the reality of magazine stories. We would all like to have our personal views espoused and glorified in a mainstream media piece; even me. What greater validation can one receive than to have his views endorsed by one of the world's largest rags? And what greater betrayal is there than to discover your views have been condensed and marginalized in favor of someone else's agenda? I admit: I was a little disappointed that many of the finer points of trolling that Matt and I talked about didn't make in to the article. But, like I said before: that's life.
"You know how on your favorite basic cable reality shows the camera captures some crazy person's meltdown? Same thing here. Trolls love a good online meltdown."
We all need to remember that Mattathias answers to an Editor, and that Editor has to balance the sincerity of the piece with the practical needs of the readers. As intelligent as NY Times readers are, this trolling thing is relatively new to them. The facts and opinions that Weev and I put forward have to be distilled down into something manageable and accessible to the general public.
That's why I'm actually glad to see Mattathias and Weev follow up they way they have. This is one of the rare times you'll see two-way journalism. How often do reporters take responsibility for their pieces by addressing subjects' concerns? This is rare and extraordinary. Most people read an article, and that's the end of the perspective. Now they get to actually interact with the people they're reading about. The internet is simply marvelous this way.
I, too, have responded to the piece. However, I put my responses in the comments sections of The Medium articles, where they were quickly drowned out by dozens of other responses. I'm reposting my thoughts here (with a couple of editing tweaks) so they're easier to find and link to.
In Response to Trolling for Ethics
From The Medium: Trolling For Ethics on 7/31/2008:
"Don't reply. Don't privately address him. Don't acknowledge his comments. Just pretend the troll doesn't exist. This gets rid of 90% of the trolls out there."
I've read this article three times now, and I'm still absorbing it. I think it's an amazing piece of reporting. It was accessible and painted a good generalized picture of the online trolling universe. It earns tremendous merit as a piece that showcases what balanced, ethical reporting should look like, as well as a piece that forces the reader to engage in critical thought.
Trolling has a spectrum of personalities, and I think they're faithfully represented here. When it comes to trolling, it's true that there's nothing funnier than watching an emotionally or intellectually unstable person have a dramatic, public meltdown to a few pokes & prods. It only gets better when the target escalates the situation with even more drama.
You know how on your favorite basic cable reality shows the camera captures some crazy person's meltdown? You squeal with delight at the sheer entertainment value of it. Same thing here. Trolls love a good online meltdown. It brings the lulz. (And just like how The Soup on E! documents all the best TV drama of the week, so EncyclopediaDramatica.com documents all the best drama of the Internet.)
Of course, there's the extreme edge of all that trolling, like with the Hendersons and Megan Meier. That's probably more like a premium cable show. The morality is ambiguous. There are no clear good guy or bad guy characters. The lulz are less obvious. But you tune in anyway because it's captivating and challenging.
The only thing that I'm sad wasn't covered is the one troll ethic: you'll never see us go after someone who has their act together. If they say or do intelligent, clever, witty, insightful things, we'll be the first to cheer and shower them with praise. We love smart people.
But God help you if you're a drama queen who complains about having a broken back that's prevented you from seeing the world in one blog post and the next day posts an ugly naked arched-back-on-a-jungle-gym photo talking about how worldly you are. You are batshit crazy, and we're going to troll you until you break.
(Edit: That's not to say telephone harassment is just playful trolling. That's the realm of /b/ and Anonymous who readily proclaim themselves far more than just garden variety trolls. I address this distinction in my next response further down.)
All that having been said, there are only two ways to deal with a troll:
"If I want to know what you really think, all I have to do is troll you for a bit, and your true colors will light up like a Vegas billboard."
1. Don't reply. Don't privately address him. Don't acknowledge his comments. Don't even make a "he who shall not be named" style reference in another blog post. Just pretend the troll doesn't exist. This gets rid of 90% of the trolls out there instantly. Then, if you're smart, shut up and quit blogging for a few days and logically re-evaluate the post that set the troll off. Chances are, there is a glaring flaw in your post that makes you look like an idiot or a nutjob, and that's why you got trolled. Don't post again until you're ready to amend it or defend it with better logic.
2. With the other 10% of trolls, you have to play the game. For every insult you receive from a troll, play along and join in the joke. If someone tells you're fat (because you probably are), don't get offended and rant. Just reply with a photo of a whale and say, "You damn skippy I'm fat! I would say this photo is me, but that wouldn't be fair. The whale isn't that big." If you can successfully take yourself and the insults less seriously, you will win the good graces of the troll and he'll either go away, or he'll chill out, knock off the insults, engage you in surprisingly intelligent and witty conversation, and you'll have made a new online friend. And trust me, it's good to have a troll for a friend.
Of course, now that I've revealed this, no troll is going to let up because you've all been warned and can no longer claim ignorance as an excuse. So, your only recourse is to just not be stupid and/or batshit crazy on the Internets. If you can do that, everything will be just fine. However, just so I can be absolutely clear about this: if you escalate a war of words with a troll, you WILL lose. We know all the tricks. We have access to all the resources. We know all the laws. We're all friends with each other. We have done this thousands of times.
Yeah, we're total assholes. And we don't care.
In Response to Mattathias Responds
From The Medium: Guest Post: Matthias Schwartz Responds on 8/1/2008:
So, it's the second day of this article's life, and I still regard it as an exemplary piece of journalism. Mattathias should be proud of his work, and people should really take time to reflect on his message.
However, I think if there is a weak point in the article, it is that /b/ gets painted with the same brush stroke that Weev and I do. Let's be clear: there are distinct differences among us.
/b/ members who engage in harassment are quick to point out that they aren't merely trolls. They acknowledge the nature and seriousness of their actions, and the impunity with which they carry out their deeds. They know who and what they are and they don't pretend to be innocuous. I won't cast a moral judgment on them simply because their value system is so vastly different from anything the rest of us know that criticism is nearly meaningless.
Weev is someone to be feared for obvious reasons. I know a lot of people have tried to argue that he trolled the NYT with his outrageous statements. There's no way he is all he says he is. All I have to say is: are you sure? Let's assume Weev rented that Rolls Royce Phantom. He would have had to have it come down from L.A. and be around for two days for $395/hr. How many trolls do you know are willing to spend that kind of money just to get their kicks messing with a bright young reporter from New York?
And then there's me. I make no excuses for me: I troll every once in a while, and I'm not nice about it. Even though I don't phone harass or do anything that crosses into /b/ territory, I know I'm a jerk. Years ago, I trolled indiscriminately for kicks & giggles without realizing what a fantastic and informing tool trolling can be. These days I troll when I want answers about human behavior. Even though it didn't make it into the article, Mattathias and I talked about this extensively.
The trolling that keeps my attention is the stuff that reveals human nature. Yes, I can have a civilized conversation with you, and take what you say at face value. However, as we all know, people are too often wrapped up in their own politically correct notions to say what they really think and feel. If I want to know what you really think, all I have to do is troll you for a bit, and your true colors will light up like a Vegas billboard. That's something you can't get by harassing someone over the phone.
Does the thought of a troll prying into your head make you uncomfortable? It should. Nobody wants to have their secret thoughts and feelings known, much less exposed, especially online. But I will share with you one observation I've had over the years: the more you try to hide who you really are, the more miserable you'll be whether you're talking to me or not. Take what you will from that.
Again, this is a good article with questions about morality that readers should contemplate carefully. Mattathias has taken the time to craft a masterpiece that encourages you to look inside yourself as much as you look outward. That's a gift you don't run across everyday.
Update (8/4): Correction
I just read a comment somewhere that said, "If Mr. Fortuny truly wants to 'save' his victims, he should somehow make his purpose known to them."
This commenter is absolutely correct, and I feel foolish for not thinking of it myself. I absolutely have a duty to inform people of why I do what I do. But, how should I go about doing it? Oh, if only I had a way to communicate my message on a massive scale to millions of people. Perhaps I should talk to a reporter for a mainstream media publication and discuss my views on this subject. That might do the trick. I'll keep everyone posted on how that goes.
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[ trolling published on 2008-08-02 | Comments (12) | Permalink (4,010) ]
Photosensitive Epilepsy: Protect Yourself On The Internet
Wired reported earlier this week how internet trolls posted animations capable of triggering migraines and seizures on an epilepsy support message board last week. The attack resulted in several people being affected.
Given the limited amount of support for photosensitive epileptics who use the internet, here is a brief guide for how to protect yourself from these types of situations when you browse. Tip #1: if you see trigger images, quickly cover your right eye, then press Esc on your keyboard. More tips and instructions after the cut.
The important thing to remember on the Internet is that you cannot rely on a forum or a website to handle your experience for you. Nor will any browsing experience ever be truly safe. There will always be an opportunity and vector for attack. Don't assume that because you're on a support forum for epileptics, that a seizure inducing trigger won't come up either on purpose or accidentally.
Even when sites say they take your security and browsing experience seriously, it's still up to you to protect yourself as best as possible. This article should help empower you to do just that.
First line of defense: cover one eye
I already stated this, but I'll emphasize it: if some blinky stuff should happen to show up on your screen that can affect you, and you haven't done anything else to protect yourself, cover your eye as quickly as possible and either close your browser, press Esc on your keyboard, or look away and get someone to help you. This tip comes from various sources on photosensitive epilepsy around the web.
First and Most Important: Update to the Latest Web Browser
Whether you prefer to use IE, Firefox, Safari, Opera, or Flock, there are basic steps you can take to make sure your browsing experience is a safer one. First, make sure you are up to date on the latest version of your browser.
Not only will this help protect you from other internet-based attacks, but it will also ensure that you can use the latest plug-ins to assist you in safer browsing.
On Internet Explorer: Go to the Tools menu on your browser bar, and click "Windows Update." Follow all prompts you see to patch and update IE.
On Firefox, Opera, and Flock: Firefox should work to keep you up-to-date. Otherwise you need to do this yourself: go to the Help menu, and click "Check For Updates." Follow all on-screen prompts.
On Safari: Visit the Safari website, and click the Download link. Follow whatever install procedure is normal for OSX or Windows.
If you're not sure how to perform browser updates, get a friend. Everyone has a knowledgable friend these days, so ignorance is no excuse.
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